It's been two years...

Dear Logan,

I can't believe it's been two years since I last held you in my arms.  Time really does fly, and I am sure I will say that every year on April 15.  Though life is back to normal in a sense, I have not stopped loving or missing you.  I can still remember vividly all the lovely moments that we spent together.  From calling you a little red lobster, since you turned red whenever you sneezed or cried, to the night time feeding with a feeding tube or a bottle, and the eventual hospitalizations.  I still have the Google Spreadsheet for tracking all the night time feeding, medication administering and your bowel movements!  I thought about deleting that file, but I wanted to hold on to those little memories of you.

I didn't take time off from work today like last year.  I only left work a little early to come see you and spend a little alone time with you before we visit you on Sunday with Daddy and Aidan.  I enjoyed that little quick visit, though heart-breaking in another sense.  Whenever I see kids around your age, I would smile and imagine what you would be like if you're still here.  Life will be hectic with two kids, but I will never know for sure, right?

Everyone is doing well.  So don't you worry about us.  We love you and miss you as always.

Love,
Mommy