Dear Logan,
As Mommy told you earlier when I came to visit you today, I had an appointment with the Geneticist and the Genetic Counselor. They both seemed to be surprised that Daddy didn't come with me to the appointment. It never occurred to me that this is such an important meeting that he should attend. Well, it's OK. I can deal with meetings with doctors, as I've been doing that since you're hospitalized. I was there with you everyday, speaking with the nurses and doctors, so I could attend this meeting all by myself.
As Mommy told you earlier, you did get your mutated DNA from me. The blood test shows that I possess the same mutated mitochondria DNA, m8993T>G mutation. The result shows that " a low level of heteroplasmic familial m.8993T>G mutation was detected. The level of heteroplasmy is less than 1% as detected by real-time ARMS PCR". This mt8993 is what causes Leigh's Disease.
So basically, Mommy has a less than 1% mutation, which is good news. The Geneticist, Dr. W said that it's very unlikely that I will develop any other symptoms in the future because of such a low level, and because I am a pretty healthy adult. That basically answered one of Mommy's four questions. However, because mitochondria is present in all parts of the body and in all organs, the result only tells us what's in my blood. It does not tell us what's happening to my brain, or liver, or ovaries, or any parts of the body. Of course, if I want to do a liver biopsy or further testing, it's possible. But Dr. W believes the sampling from the blood should be a pretty good representation of what's going on inside my body. He said it usually takes a 40-50% mutation to start seeing other symptoms. The first one would be eye diseases, which I forgot the name of the disease that he said is most common. As for you, my dear, you have a 90% mutation. It's no wonder everything happened so fast all of a sudden. The percentage was so high. I can't believe it could be this high, when Mommy has such a low percentage.
As for your older brother, Dr. W said he should be OK. He has not exhibited any symptoms, and is a healthy 3-year old. Symptoms usually exhibit between 3 months and 2 years old. As I've told you before, I have changed my stand in getting Aidan tested. Dr. W agreed with me. Your brother is very likely to possess that mutated DNA, but it's probably a very small percentage that doesn't affect him. We probably don't want to frighten him with needles. When he gets older, and if we still want to know, then we could proceed with the blood test. I guess for now, we'll just pay attention to his eyes. And since he's a boy, he is not going to pass this to his future children. I am grateful he's not a girl.
When we talked about future pregnancies, Dr. W said it is possible to do pre-natal testing. However, the result might not be definitive as well, just like how he has explained to me regarding the absence of other biopsies and tests for other organs to get the full picture. But if I do decide to have another baby, it's definitely recommended to get the baby tested. Dr. W said, statistically, the chance of having another baby with a high percentage of mutation is pretty low, esp. since you were at 90%. But, is Mommy going to risk it? I told Dr. W that I probably would not have another baby. I am scared. It's when we started talking about this subject, that Mommy started to cry. I could not go through this again. Sometimes it feels like you've been gone for a very long time, but actually, it's only been 2.5 months. The wound is still new, and I don't think I will be able to have a worry-free pregnancyor the first couple years of the new baby's life.
We then started to talk about your Auntie Mena and Uncle Carlos. It's unsure whether Mommy got the DNA mutation from Ah Po, or that I am the first in the family to have that. If they could get tested, then we would know. And since they are both pretty healthy, it's very likely that they both either possess a very low percentage, or not even have it. But the concern becomes, what if Auntie does have the mutated DNA, she might pass it along to her future children. Should she get tested? If so, how the heck are we going to do that in Macau. I am not sure how I am going to explain all this to her and to Ah Po. I don't want to scare them, but I think it's important information that they should know, and to think about.
Mitochondrial disease are so rare, yet Leigh's Disease is one of the more common ones, according to Dr. W. He said most pediatricians probably do not have any patients with this disease. They might have heard of it or studied about it, but do not have first-hand experience with Mitochondrial disease, except PICU. It's not like cancer, or heart disease, or AIDS, that most people have heard of. I hope in the future, a cure will be found. But with such a rare disease, getting funding to do research is even tougher. Mommy hopes by blogging about your experience, we are bringing more awareness to this disease.
Logan, please watch over all of us and make sure this 1% is not getting any higher in other parts of our body.
Mommy will be going back to work tomorrow afternoon. Life will be busy, but more consistent again. I might not have as much time to write to you everyday or to visit you as often, but Mommy will still think about you often.
Love,
Mommy
Monday, June 29, 2009
Genetics and Potty Training
Dear Logan,
In a couple hours, Mommy will be heading down south to meet with the Geneticist to discuss the results of my blood test. I am not sure what the conversation is like, but I have a feeling that I do possess the same DNA mutation in my mitochondria. If not, how else are you going to get that? It would be very rare for you to have the illness without me giving that to you. I was adamant in getting your brother tested, if I were to be positive. However, now that I think about it, if your brother seems to be doing fine, and this mutation is only passed along by mothers, maybe I won't have your brother tested. Afterall, why subject him to the trauma of getting his blood drawn when he's this young. However, I need to consult with the Geneticist and then talk to Daddy to decide what's going to happen. I was going to prepare some questions to ask the Geneticist, but I think they will probably cover all of my questions. The most important thing is, will your brother be OK, and will I be OK. If I were to have another baby, what are the chances that the future baby will have the same mutation, and if this could be tested with the amniocentesis. These are my main questions.
On to the your brother's potty-training, it's not going too well. I don't think we're making much progress and Daddy and Mommy are getting very frustrated. I know we're not supposed to, as all the other experts say, but it's hard not to. It seems like he couldn't feel the urge to go pee pee in the potty. He definitey felt the urge to go poopy, coz he told us. Yay! But he won't go pee all by himself. We had to tell him to go, then he might pee in there. The most upsetting moment was last night before he went to bed. I knew he would pee about every 30 mins if he has drunk something. So, after dinner, we played a little, then brushed his teeth. His 30-minute mark was almost there, and after brushing, I told him to go potty while I drew water for his bath. Once I turned around to draw water, he immediately peed in his pants while standing on the stool (where he stood to brush his teeth). I was so pissed off. I just told him to step down and go potty and he didn't! I was so upset with him, I didn't talk to him much during the whole bath, and after I put him to bed, I told him I was not going to sleep with him and he had to sleep all by himself. I then proceeded to wash his clothes by hand, as I just turned on the washer for all of his other dirty underwear. After I finished washing and checked on him, he already fell asleep.
I felt really bad afterwards. I knew I should have held my cool, afterall, I am the adult here, right? And he was so tired, since he didn't nap yesterday. Maybe being tired has affected his potty-training ability? I don't know. I read that you have to give kids a lot of salty snacks and fluids, so that they will go often. We didn't really do that, just the usual amount of fluid. Maybe we didn't give him enough fluid so that he could feel the urge to go? I don't know. He would go if I forcefully tell him to. But if I asked if he needed to go, he always says no. I don't know if he couldn't feel the urge, he defiantly said no, or by the time he felt it, it was too late. I guess we'll have to try it another weekend. I hope I have not traumatized him. It's hard not to give him pressure.
Well, Logan, I'll see you in a little while. I'm gonna come see you after I see the Geneticist. I also want to take two of the pinwheels away from you, leaving just one, and see if the people are going to take it away on Wednesday during flower clean-up time. See you soon.
Love you,
Mommy
In a couple hours, Mommy will be heading down south to meet with the Geneticist to discuss the results of my blood test. I am not sure what the conversation is like, but I have a feeling that I do possess the same DNA mutation in my mitochondria. If not, how else are you going to get that? It would be very rare for you to have the illness without me giving that to you. I was adamant in getting your brother tested, if I were to be positive. However, now that I think about it, if your brother seems to be doing fine, and this mutation is only passed along by mothers, maybe I won't have your brother tested. Afterall, why subject him to the trauma of getting his blood drawn when he's this young. However, I need to consult with the Geneticist and then talk to Daddy to decide what's going to happen. I was going to prepare some questions to ask the Geneticist, but I think they will probably cover all of my questions. The most important thing is, will your brother be OK, and will I be OK. If I were to have another baby, what are the chances that the future baby will have the same mutation, and if this could be tested with the amniocentesis. These are my main questions.
On to the your brother's potty-training, it's not going too well. I don't think we're making much progress and Daddy and Mommy are getting very frustrated. I know we're not supposed to, as all the other experts say, but it's hard not to. It seems like he couldn't feel the urge to go pee pee in the potty. He definitey felt the urge to go poopy, coz he told us. Yay! But he won't go pee all by himself. We had to tell him to go, then he might pee in there. The most upsetting moment was last night before he went to bed. I knew he would pee about every 30 mins if he has drunk something. So, after dinner, we played a little, then brushed his teeth. His 30-minute mark was almost there, and after brushing, I told him to go potty while I drew water for his bath. Once I turned around to draw water, he immediately peed in his pants while standing on the stool (where he stood to brush his teeth). I was so pissed off. I just told him to step down and go potty and he didn't! I was so upset with him, I didn't talk to him much during the whole bath, and after I put him to bed, I told him I was not going to sleep with him and he had to sleep all by himself. I then proceeded to wash his clothes by hand, as I just turned on the washer for all of his other dirty underwear. After I finished washing and checked on him, he already fell asleep.
I felt really bad afterwards. I knew I should have held my cool, afterall, I am the adult here, right? And he was so tired, since he didn't nap yesterday. Maybe being tired has affected his potty-training ability? I don't know. I read that you have to give kids a lot of salty snacks and fluids, so that they will go often. We didn't really do that, just the usual amount of fluid. Maybe we didn't give him enough fluid so that he could feel the urge to go? I don't know. He would go if I forcefully tell him to. But if I asked if he needed to go, he always says no. I don't know if he couldn't feel the urge, he defiantly said no, or by the time he felt it, it was too late. I guess we'll have to try it another weekend. I hope I have not traumatized him. It's hard not to give him pressure.
Well, Logan, I'll see you in a little while. I'm gonna come see you after I see the Geneticist. I also want to take two of the pinwheels away from you, leaving just one, and see if the people are going to take it away on Wednesday during flower clean-up time. See you soon.
Love you,
Mommy
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Potty ... Shower...
Hello Logan,
Your brother's potty-training hasn't been going very well. Yesterday, he wet 3 underwears and 2 pairs of pants. Arrghh... He was doing fine in the morning when we told him to go, and he actually poopy in the potty! Yay, right? But then, it all went downhill. We set a timer to remind us to tell him to go potty every hour, and every 30 mins after he drank a lot of fluid. That's a bad idea. He seemed to think that he only had to go when the timer went off! So, I took the timer away and just tried to remind him every so often. The only progress that I have seen yesterday, was he is more willing to sit in the potty than before. But we are very, very, very far away from being potty-trained. It's especially hard when he's interested in an activity, and he would totally forget to go pee pee. Hopefully, today we have a little more luck. Your brother is currently sitting on the couch watching "Cars" (for the 1,000,000,000th time). I showed him that if he needs to go pee pee, he can press the PAUSE button, then press PLAY when he's done. I know he understands that, but whether he will do it, that's another question. I'll just have to check-on him periodically.
Yesterday was such a hot, hot day. At least it's not humid, so Mommy wasn't sweating like a pig. The shower was fun. I was glad that the guests seemed to have fun with the games that we played. Mommy was in charge of a few games. The first one was, Guess the Baby Food. Pretty straightforward, Mommy got 6 jars of baby food, ripped the label off, numbered them, and had the guests guess what flavors the baby food were. I intentionally got a couple colors that looked similar like, carrots + squash + sweet potato, and peas + green beans. I think the toughest one was the last one, pears. Many thought it was either applesauce or banana. I intentionally didn't get them, and got pears! Ha! But guess what, Auntie Beverly guessed them all correct, and she's the only one!
The second game was Baby Bag Mystery. I put 5 different items in separate brown bags and had the guests tried to guess by feeling the bag. The items were, a pacifier, a pacifier holder, a pair of booties, a baby bottle and a baby nail clipper. The toughest ones were the pacifier holder and the pair of booties. One participant guessed 4 out of 5 (except the booties), which was pretty good!
The third game was Delectably Dirty Diapers. I selected 4 different chocolates, and melted them in 4 different diapers, thus making it seemed like they were poopy diapers. Guests would have to guess what kinds of chocolates were there. They could smell, or taste if they wanted, from the diaper. To make it a little easier, I told him which four chocolates were selected. We had two guests that got them correct! This game was the last one we played, and I guess some guests were a little shy with the dirty diapers and didn't want to participate. hehe....
We actually had two more games, but I felt that people were all gamed out, esp. when we announced the next game to guess the size of the Hostess' tummy. It was getting late, people were having food coma, and it was getting really warm in the house. Your big brother was sugar high and was starting to act out, so we decided to leave.
It was funny to see that the most popular activities for the kids at the party were: The Wii and Playdough. Guess which one your brother liked most? Of course, the Wii. I think he was getting a little out of control. At least he was willing to share when I asked him to, and to wait for his turn. Unfortunately, while he was bowling, he accidentally whacked a toddler in his face. Poor little guy was in shock at first, and then started to cry. I felt so bad about it. Well, your brother did play some playdough when we first arrived. We rolled it into a bowling ball and three bowling pins for him to play on the floor. I think he's into bowling these days, esp. when he finally figured out how to play bowling on the Wii. I think we gotta take him bowling one day to see the real deal. Daddy likes to bowl, and maybe we could hang out with Uncle John and Auntie Katie, and maybe Uncle Brian one day and do some bowling. I just wonder if they have a small bowling ball for your brother. I don't want him to break any bones quite yet.
We'll be having lunch with Uncle Brian and his girlfriend in San Francisco later today. It's going to be another warm day, plus traffic jam, since it's Gay Pride Weekend. Luckily, we'll be in the West Portal area, and wouldn't be in the heart of all the traffic.
Let's hope your brother's potty training produces some good progress today.
Love you,
Mommy
Your brother's potty-training hasn't been going very well. Yesterday, he wet 3 underwears and 2 pairs of pants. Arrghh... He was doing fine in the morning when we told him to go, and he actually poopy in the potty! Yay, right? But then, it all went downhill. We set a timer to remind us to tell him to go potty every hour, and every 30 mins after he drank a lot of fluid. That's a bad idea. He seemed to think that he only had to go when the timer went off! So, I took the timer away and just tried to remind him every so often. The only progress that I have seen yesterday, was he is more willing to sit in the potty than before. But we are very, very, very far away from being potty-trained. It's especially hard when he's interested in an activity, and he would totally forget to go pee pee. Hopefully, today we have a little more luck. Your brother is currently sitting on the couch watching "Cars" (for the 1,000,000,000th time). I showed him that if he needs to go pee pee, he can press the PAUSE button, then press PLAY when he's done. I know he understands that, but whether he will do it, that's another question. I'll just have to check-on him periodically.
Yesterday was such a hot, hot day. At least it's not humid, so Mommy wasn't sweating like a pig. The shower was fun. I was glad that the guests seemed to have fun with the games that we played. Mommy was in charge of a few games. The first one was, Guess the Baby Food. Pretty straightforward, Mommy got 6 jars of baby food, ripped the label off, numbered them, and had the guests guess what flavors the baby food were. I intentionally got a couple colors that looked similar like, carrots + squash + sweet potato, and peas + green beans. I think the toughest one was the last one, pears. Many thought it was either applesauce or banana. I intentionally didn't get them, and got pears! Ha! But guess what, Auntie Beverly guessed them all correct, and she's the only one!
The second game was Baby Bag Mystery. I put 5 different items in separate brown bags and had the guests tried to guess by feeling the bag. The items were, a pacifier, a pacifier holder, a pair of booties, a baby bottle and a baby nail clipper. The toughest ones were the pacifier holder and the pair of booties. One participant guessed 4 out of 5 (except the booties), which was pretty good!
The third game was Delectably Dirty Diapers. I selected 4 different chocolates, and melted them in 4 different diapers, thus making it seemed like they were poopy diapers. Guests would have to guess what kinds of chocolates were there. They could smell, or taste if they wanted, from the diaper. To make it a little easier, I told him which four chocolates were selected. We had two guests that got them correct! This game was the last one we played, and I guess some guests were a little shy with the dirty diapers and didn't want to participate. hehe....
We actually had two more games, but I felt that people were all gamed out, esp. when we announced the next game to guess the size of the Hostess' tummy. It was getting late, people were having food coma, and it was getting really warm in the house. Your big brother was sugar high and was starting to act out, so we decided to leave.
It was funny to see that the most popular activities for the kids at the party were: The Wii and Playdough. Guess which one your brother liked most? Of course, the Wii. I think he was getting a little out of control. At least he was willing to share when I asked him to, and to wait for his turn. Unfortunately, while he was bowling, he accidentally whacked a toddler in his face. Poor little guy was in shock at first, and then started to cry. I felt so bad about it. Well, your brother did play some playdough when we first arrived. We rolled it into a bowling ball and three bowling pins for him to play on the floor. I think he's into bowling these days, esp. when he finally figured out how to play bowling on the Wii. I think we gotta take him bowling one day to see the real deal. Daddy likes to bowl, and maybe we could hang out with Uncle John and Auntie Katie, and maybe Uncle Brian one day and do some bowling. I just wonder if they have a small bowling ball for your brother. I don't want him to break any bones quite yet.
We'll be having lunch with Uncle Brian and his girlfriend in San Francisco later today. It's going to be another warm day, plus traffic jam, since it's Gay Pride Weekend. Luckily, we'll be in the West Portal area, and wouldn't be in the heart of all the traffic.
Let's hope your brother's potty training produces some good progress today.
Love you,
Mommy
Friday, June 26, 2009
Mission Impossible? Potty Training!
Dear Logan,
Mommy had a busy morning today. I first dropped off your brother at school. It was so nice to see that his friends were excited to see him back. I asked one of the teachers how he's doing at school, especially during circle time, since he likes to run around and not sit still. The teacher, who's a floater, actually said your brother sat still once he saw the other kids were sitting down. He didn't run around like a mad monkey! Hip Hip Hooray! He's still very talkative, but definitely has matured a little. Apparently, this floater teacher has been prepped beforehand that my monkey likes to run around and not sit still. I am glad he proved them wrong. I also talked to the primary teacher about his potty-training. Your brother is doing very well in school, requesting to use the bathroom and all. But none of that happens at home. Ever since he goes back to school, he hasn't been napping. Thus, when it's time to go home, he falls asleep in the car every evening. When he gets home, he's so tired and sleepy that we couldn't make good use of the new underwear that I bought him. We'll start trying this weekend, and to see have him wear his underwear to school on Monday.
I know compared to other kids, your brother should have been potty-trained by now. Afterall, he's almost 3.5 years old. But so much has happened within the last year. I remember Mommy first introduced the potty to him when he's 2 or 2.5. But he wasn't interested and all doctors said that we shouldn't force him, and if he's ready, he'll be ready. So, we didn't really push the issue. Then, Mommy was pregnant with you, he changed from a family day care to a new pre-school, your birth, the visit of Ah Gung and Ah Po, your hospitalization, you leaving us, and our trip back to Asia, there have been too many changes. Now that everything should be back to normal, we'll give it a go again, especially, when he seems to be doing well in school. Let's see how that goes. I will definitely bring extra pair of underwear and pants for him on Monday!
Mommy was busy doing grocery shopping and shopping for the baby shower tomorrow. Speaking of the baby shower, how silly was Mommy to think that Auntie had no one to throw her a shower! Doh! I met with her yesterday, and apparently she had another shower the week before. The shower tomorrow is just one that they throw themselves. Silly Mommy for actually feeling bad for them! But that doesn't change the fact that I am more than happy to help them with the games and activities. We've decided of 5 different games, so Mommy went to buy some props just now. I'll tell you about the games tomorrow. I hope her friends won't be too shy, and will actually participate.
That's it for today. I'll tell you all about the shower and your brother's potty training progress tomorrow.
Love you,
Mommy
Mommy had a busy morning today. I first dropped off your brother at school. It was so nice to see that his friends were excited to see him back. I asked one of the teachers how he's doing at school, especially during circle time, since he likes to run around and not sit still. The teacher, who's a floater, actually said your brother sat still once he saw the other kids were sitting down. He didn't run around like a mad monkey! Hip Hip Hooray! He's still very talkative, but definitely has matured a little. Apparently, this floater teacher has been prepped beforehand that my monkey likes to run around and not sit still. I am glad he proved them wrong. I also talked to the primary teacher about his potty-training. Your brother is doing very well in school, requesting to use the bathroom and all. But none of that happens at home. Ever since he goes back to school, he hasn't been napping. Thus, when it's time to go home, he falls asleep in the car every evening. When he gets home, he's so tired and sleepy that we couldn't make good use of the new underwear that I bought him. We'll start trying this weekend, and to see have him wear his underwear to school on Monday.
I know compared to other kids, your brother should have been potty-trained by now. Afterall, he's almost 3.5 years old. But so much has happened within the last year. I remember Mommy first introduced the potty to him when he's 2 or 2.5. But he wasn't interested and all doctors said that we shouldn't force him, and if he's ready, he'll be ready. So, we didn't really push the issue. Then, Mommy was pregnant with you, he changed from a family day care to a new pre-school, your birth, the visit of Ah Gung and Ah Po, your hospitalization, you leaving us, and our trip back to Asia, there have been too many changes. Now that everything should be back to normal, we'll give it a go again, especially, when he seems to be doing well in school. Let's see how that goes. I will definitely bring extra pair of underwear and pants for him on Monday!
Mommy was busy doing grocery shopping and shopping for the baby shower tomorrow. Speaking of the baby shower, how silly was Mommy to think that Auntie had no one to throw her a shower! Doh! I met with her yesterday, and apparently she had another shower the week before. The shower tomorrow is just one that they throw themselves. Silly Mommy for actually feeling bad for them! But that doesn't change the fact that I am more than happy to help them with the games and activities. We've decided of 5 different games, so Mommy went to buy some props just now. I'll tell you about the games tomorrow. I hope her friends won't be too shy, and will actually participate.
That's it for today. I'll tell you all about the shower and your brother's potty training progress tomorrow.
Love you,
Mommy
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Your Beautiful Memory Quilt
Oh my Dear Logan,
A most wonderful gift arrived yesterday! Remember some time ago, Mommy told you I didn't know what to do with all of your clothes and Auntie Shelley offered to make a quilt out of it?
Guess what, the quilt has arrived!! It is so beautiful!! When Mommy read the letter from Auntie Shelley enclosed, I couldn't help but shed tears. It reminded Mommy of you, your short life, the little sleepers that you lived in them because you're a Winter baby, and most importantly, I was moved by such a wonderful and thoughtful gift. Mommy was holding the quilt, cried for a while, before I could fully appreciate its beauty. I had to re-read the letter and appreciate each of its detail. Let me show you the pictures of it, and the meaning behind each detail that Auntie Shelley told me.
Oh Logan, I don't know what to say. It is such a beauty! We are blessed with such good friends, who have done so much for us. First, their outpouring love through phone calls, emails, text messages, hugs, kisses, and reading this blog. Then their generous donation to March for Baby and The United Mitochondrial Foundation. And now, two precious gifts, a rosary and a memory quilt. What have we done to deserve such great friends!
Mommy was talking to Daddy last night about how we wanted to display this lovely quilt. We wanted to hang it up, especially after we move. However, we're not sure how to do it. If we just hang it up, it'll be get dusty. If we frame it with glass, it will become very heavy to hang. We need to think of a way to do it. I was telling Daddy that displaying this quilt would not be as sad as putting your pictures all over the house. It's beautiful, yet we won't be seeing your face all the time, thus being reminded of your absence. Don't worry, we will not forget you, but I don't think being constantly reminded is healthy either, right?
We'll think of something!
Miss you,
Mommy
A most wonderful gift arrived yesterday! Remember some time ago, Mommy told you I didn't know what to do with all of your clothes and Auntie Shelley offered to make a quilt out of it?
Guess what, the quilt has arrived!! It is so beautiful!! When Mommy read the letter from Auntie Shelley enclosed, I couldn't help but shed tears. It reminded Mommy of you, your short life, the little sleepers that you lived in them because you're a Winter baby, and most importantly, I was moved by such a wonderful and thoughtful gift. Mommy was holding the quilt, cried for a while, before I could fully appreciate its beauty. I had to re-read the letter and appreciate each of its detail. Let me show you the pictures of it, and the meaning behind each detail that Auntie Shelley told me.
"The quilt design is a pattern called 'One thousand pyramids' (even though there may or may not actually 1000 triangles in the quilt). The name reminded me of the origami custom of folding 1000 cranes to have one's heart's desire come true. Although the custom is Japanese, I thought the sentiment to be universal and therefore appropriate. All of the triangles were made from Logan's sleepers and I am sure you will recognize them."
Here are two pictures of the close-up of the quilt, showing each of the pyramids/triangles. Such detailed work. Logan, a lot of hard work is put into this. There are so many triangles!
"There wasn't enough solid color sleepers to make the borders, so I used blocks of soft fleece. To symbolize his ascent into Heaven, I machine embroidered an angel to watch over him at the top..."
"...a companion angel on one side..."
"...and himself as a little boy angel on the other side."
"The quilting design (the stitching that holds the top and backing together) are puffy clouds. I deliberately chose a very fine thread so the quilting wouldn't distract from the sleeper fabric. but you can see the cloud design when you look at the back! I was particularly pleased with the way the sleeper fabric contributed to the three dimensional aspect of the clouds. The swag designs in the borders were chosen just because they are pretty ;-)"
"I found an incredibly moving poem for the label on the back and hand-appliqued Logan's picture and the label. I further embellished the label with hand embroidery."
Oh Logan, I don't know what to say. It is such a beauty! We are blessed with such good friends, who have done so much for us. First, their outpouring love through phone calls, emails, text messages, hugs, kisses, and reading this blog. Then their generous donation to March for Baby and The United Mitochondrial Foundation. And now, two precious gifts, a rosary and a memory quilt. What have we done to deserve such great friends!
Mommy was talking to Daddy last night about how we wanted to display this lovely quilt. We wanted to hang it up, especially after we move. However, we're not sure how to do it. If we just hang it up, it'll be get dusty. If we frame it with glass, it will become very heavy to hang. We need to think of a way to do it. I was telling Daddy that displaying this quilt would not be as sad as putting your pictures all over the house. It's beautiful, yet we won't be seeing your face all the time, thus being reminded of your absence. Don't worry, we will not forget you, but I don't think being constantly reminded is healthy either, right?
We'll think of something!
Miss you,
Mommy
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
What a relief!
Hello Logan,
Mommy is relieved!! I am not sure if I can take this emotionally if things don't turn out right. Like I mentioned early this morning, we have your brother's evaluation at the ASD clinic today. The evaluation was supposed to last 3-4 hours, but luckily for us, it only took 2 hours. We went in and met with two psychologists. One took Aidan to another room to play, aka. evaluation, and the other stayed with Daddy and Mommy, and asked us some questions. We had already previously completed a super-duper long questionnaire for them, so they already had some basic information, and also knew about you.
We told them our main concern: obsession with doors/buttons/elevators/escalators, difficult transition from these obsessions, short attention span, and maybe his socialization skills. After our little chat, we waited in the waiting room for your brother to finish up with the evaluation. He got to take a little break while the doctors consulted with each other. Then we all went into another playroom. Mommy and Daddy got to see how your big brother interacted with the doctor. The other doctor was observing through a one-sided mirror in another room. We saw the doctor asked your brother questions, let him play different toys, and most importantly, pretend-play. There were a few times when he insisted on playing with toys that he liked, such as, toys with sounds and music, and the bubbles. He also spotted the doctor opening the door of the cabinet and then open and close the door (not continuously) but would put toys in the cabinet after playing with the doctor (even though the toys do not belong there). I think most surprising to us was his ability to do pretend-play very well. They were having a birthday party for a baby doll, and you know your brother LOVES birthday parties, esp. blowing out candles. We never did any pretend play with him, but I know he does that at school. So, it was nice to see him participate and actually did a very good job. I have also noticed that his language skills have improved, and he was definitely more vocal than the last time when he saw the other psychologist.
After playing, we were led back to the waiting room. When we met up with the doctors, the first thing that they said was they didn't think your brother has Autism. Alleluia!!!! That's what I've been waiting to hear! I asked about his obsession with doors, open and closing and him not sitting still. They think it's very likely his personality, or he's just a 3.5-year old boy. He will probably grow out of it. If he doesn't by school age, that is, 5 years old, then it might become a concern. They also said that his receptive language is his strongest, rated at 46 months (when he's only 41 months old). His expressive language is the weakest, rated at 42 months, still not bad. I am not surprised at this result because like I've been saying recently, I could reason with your brother and he understands. And I am always a little concerned that he doesn't talk enough, but I did notice improvement. I was telling the doctors that when it was Aidan's 2-year old check-up, I had minor concerns that he didn't seem to be speaking enough words. The pediatrician at the time said she could refer him for speech therapy if I like, but I wanted to wait and see. I noticed a difference when he turned 3, esp. when he started going to school, and when he was in Macau. He was stimulated a lot more. The doctors said they will be writing a report and will send us a copy. It's up to us if we want to share that with the school.
Tomorrow, I'll be bringing your brother to school. I will probably give them a brief update, and might give them a copy of the report. I need to read the report first and think about it. But I can proudly say that my son is totally fine! I knew he is fine all along. And they tried to scare the crap out of me! I don't blame them though. Autism is such a big deal here, and as teachers, they do need to look out for signs. However, as teachers, they also need to come up with ways to teach kids. Everyone learns differently.
Oh Logan, Mommy is so relieved! After all that has happened recently, I am not sure if I can take any more bad news. Thanks for watching over your big brother. I know you'll be his guardian angel.
Love you,
Mommy
Mommy is relieved!! I am not sure if I can take this emotionally if things don't turn out right. Like I mentioned early this morning, we have your brother's evaluation at the ASD clinic today. The evaluation was supposed to last 3-4 hours, but luckily for us, it only took 2 hours. We went in and met with two psychologists. One took Aidan to another room to play, aka. evaluation, and the other stayed with Daddy and Mommy, and asked us some questions. We had already previously completed a super-duper long questionnaire for them, so they already had some basic information, and also knew about you.
We told them our main concern: obsession with doors/buttons/elevators/escalators, difficult transition from these obsessions, short attention span, and maybe his socialization skills. After our little chat, we waited in the waiting room for your brother to finish up with the evaluation. He got to take a little break while the doctors consulted with each other. Then we all went into another playroom. Mommy and Daddy got to see how your big brother interacted with the doctor. The other doctor was observing through a one-sided mirror in another room. We saw the doctor asked your brother questions, let him play different toys, and most importantly, pretend-play. There were a few times when he insisted on playing with toys that he liked, such as, toys with sounds and music, and the bubbles. He also spotted the doctor opening the door of the cabinet and then open and close the door (not continuously) but would put toys in the cabinet after playing with the doctor (even though the toys do not belong there). I think most surprising to us was his ability to do pretend-play very well. They were having a birthday party for a baby doll, and you know your brother LOVES birthday parties, esp. blowing out candles. We never did any pretend play with him, but I know he does that at school. So, it was nice to see him participate and actually did a very good job. I have also noticed that his language skills have improved, and he was definitely more vocal than the last time when he saw the other psychologist.
After playing, we were led back to the waiting room. When we met up with the doctors, the first thing that they said was they didn't think your brother has Autism. Alleluia!!!! That's what I've been waiting to hear! I asked about his obsession with doors, open and closing and him not sitting still. They think it's very likely his personality, or he's just a 3.5-year old boy. He will probably grow out of it. If he doesn't by school age, that is, 5 years old, then it might become a concern. They also said that his receptive language is his strongest, rated at 46 months (when he's only 41 months old). His expressive language is the weakest, rated at 42 months, still not bad. I am not surprised at this result because like I've been saying recently, I could reason with your brother and he understands. And I am always a little concerned that he doesn't talk enough, but I did notice improvement. I was telling the doctors that when it was Aidan's 2-year old check-up, I had minor concerns that he didn't seem to be speaking enough words. The pediatrician at the time said she could refer him for speech therapy if I like, but I wanted to wait and see. I noticed a difference when he turned 3, esp. when he started going to school, and when he was in Macau. He was stimulated a lot more. The doctors said they will be writing a report and will send us a copy. It's up to us if we want to share that with the school.
Tomorrow, I'll be bringing your brother to school. I will probably give them a brief update, and might give them a copy of the report. I need to read the report first and think about it. But I can proudly say that my son is totally fine! I knew he is fine all along. And they tried to scare the crap out of me! I don't blame them though. Autism is such a big deal here, and as teachers, they do need to look out for signs. However, as teachers, they also need to come up with ways to teach kids. Everyone learns differently.
Oh Logan, Mommy is so relieved! After all that has happened recently, I am not sure if I can take any more bad news. Thanks for watching over your big brother. I know you'll be his guardian angel.
Love you,
Mommy
Every baby should be celebrated!
Hello Sweetheart,
Mommy is still trying to get rid of the jet lag. I was so tired yesterday that I fell asleep even before it's your brother's bedtime. I was so tired I couldn't do anything in the evening. And now, it's 5:30 a.m. and I just finished showering. I think my jet lag is getting a little better. On the other hand, I think your brother is fine. We were out yesterday to the playground and had some meatballs at Ikea. By the time we're done with lunch, it's already past 1 p.m., and we were supposed to do some shopping. However, I changed my plans and took your brother home for a nap. I wanted him to get back to his usual routine, as he has to go back to school tomorrow. He gotta nap in school!
Today is the big day of your brother's evaluation at the Autism Spectrum Clinic in San Francisco. Please, please watch over your big brother. I really think he's fine, maybe some minor obsession. But honestly, I really don't want him to go through any therapy at such a young age, even though I know it's best for him, IF he needs it. Of course if he needs it, I won't fight it. I just don't want that to happen, and I don't know how I am going to coordinate my time to do that as I will be going back to work next week. I think during our trip back to Asia, your brother really has matured. He is still a little monkey boy, but I could reason with him most of the time to get him out of a tantrum. He might not be as articulate as other 3.5 year olds, but you can't expect everyone to develop all their skills at the same place, right? I think your brother is very smart in other areas! Well, he's cut his addiction to the gameboy, laptop and ipod. Yay, right? But no, he's addicted to the Wii now. At least he's moving his arm when he's playing and not just sitting still right? haha..
Remember I told you about the rosary that Auntie Goretti gave me? Mommy was so silly that I didn't even notice the words she wrote behind the card until yesterday. This rosay is SO special! She made it herself and this is what she said, "I used the natural citrine because it is Logan's birthstone, Fresh water pearl is yours (Mommy), and the garnet crystal cross represents Aidan's birthstone. Hey, what a coincidence, my son's name is also Aidan. Too bad I don't know Hank's birthday, but you can tell me later then I'll make a birthstone charm to hook on the rosary". Wow! What a thoughtful gift!! Mommy is so touched!! Thank you so much!!!
Also, Mommy will be helping another Auntie and Uncle to plan games for their baby shower this weekend. Since I am not back to work yet, I've offered to help them. They needed help with games, so why not! It might be a big responsibility, but I'm up for the challenge. I have actually never hosted any baby shower and only attended two (mine included). All babies should be celebrated!! I was surprised to see that they are the ones throwing the shower, instead of their friends or relatives, as that's traditionally how it's done. But who cares, as long as the baby is celebrated and everyone has fun, it doesn't matter who threw it.
Thinking back, Mommy never had a baby shower for you, because you're the second child. Having another shower for a second child that close to your first, is sometimes considered greedy and asking for more gifts. Well, you still got lots of gifts from many uncles and aunties after your birth. But, Mommy should have had a shower or a little party for you, and tell guests not to bring any gifts. You never had any party. I waited for your Red Egg, thinking it's better to wait till you no longer needed that nasal cannula anymore, and wait till you're stronger. I was so wrong, I should have introduced to you everyone. Now the only party you've ever had was the lunch after your funeral mass. That is so wrong. I am sorry, honey. Mommy should be smarter about this. You deserve to be celebrated as much as your brother.
Well, Mommy gotta go. I'll tell you all about your brother's evaluation later. Pray for him, dear.
Love you,
Mommy
Mommy is still trying to get rid of the jet lag. I was so tired yesterday that I fell asleep even before it's your brother's bedtime. I was so tired I couldn't do anything in the evening. And now, it's 5:30 a.m. and I just finished showering. I think my jet lag is getting a little better. On the other hand, I think your brother is fine. We were out yesterday to the playground and had some meatballs at Ikea. By the time we're done with lunch, it's already past 1 p.m., and we were supposed to do some shopping. However, I changed my plans and took your brother home for a nap. I wanted him to get back to his usual routine, as he has to go back to school tomorrow. He gotta nap in school!
Today is the big day of your brother's evaluation at the Autism Spectrum Clinic in San Francisco. Please, please watch over your big brother. I really think he's fine, maybe some minor obsession. But honestly, I really don't want him to go through any therapy at such a young age, even though I know it's best for him, IF he needs it. Of course if he needs it, I won't fight it. I just don't want that to happen, and I don't know how I am going to coordinate my time to do that as I will be going back to work next week. I think during our trip back to Asia, your brother really has matured. He is still a little monkey boy, but I could reason with him most of the time to get him out of a tantrum. He might not be as articulate as other 3.5 year olds, but you can't expect everyone to develop all their skills at the same place, right? I think your brother is very smart in other areas! Well, he's cut his addiction to the gameboy, laptop and ipod. Yay, right? But no, he's addicted to the Wii now. At least he's moving his arm when he's playing and not just sitting still right? haha..
Remember I told you about the rosary that Auntie Goretti gave me? Mommy was so silly that I didn't even notice the words she wrote behind the card until yesterday. This rosay is SO special! She made it herself and this is what she said, "I used the natural citrine because it is Logan's birthstone, Fresh water pearl is yours (Mommy), and the garnet crystal cross represents Aidan's birthstone. Hey, what a coincidence, my son's name is also Aidan. Too bad I don't know Hank's birthday, but you can tell me later then I'll make a birthstone charm to hook on the rosary". Wow! What a thoughtful gift!! Mommy is so touched!! Thank you so much!!!
Also, Mommy will be helping another Auntie and Uncle to plan games for their baby shower this weekend. Since I am not back to work yet, I've offered to help them. They needed help with games, so why not! It might be a big responsibility, but I'm up for the challenge. I have actually never hosted any baby shower and only attended two (mine included). All babies should be celebrated!! I was surprised to see that they are the ones throwing the shower, instead of their friends or relatives, as that's traditionally how it's done. But who cares, as long as the baby is celebrated and everyone has fun, it doesn't matter who threw it.
Thinking back, Mommy never had a baby shower for you, because you're the second child. Having another shower for a second child that close to your first, is sometimes considered greedy and asking for more gifts. Well, you still got lots of gifts from many uncles and aunties after your birth. But, Mommy should have had a shower or a little party for you, and tell guests not to bring any gifts. You never had any party. I waited for your Red Egg, thinking it's better to wait till you no longer needed that nasal cannula anymore, and wait till you're stronger. I was so wrong, I should have introduced to you everyone. Now the only party you've ever had was the lunch after your funeral mass. That is so wrong. I am sorry, honey. Mommy should be smarter about this. You deserve to be celebrated as much as your brother.
Well, Mommy gotta go. I'll tell you all about your brother's evaluation later. Pray for him, dear.
Love you,
Mommy
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Happy Father's Day!
Dear Logan,
What a beautiful day today for Father's Day! Did you like the new pinwheels and blue flowers that we brought to you today? It was interesting to try to put them into the soil. What about the little toys that Daddy saved for you? Your brother used to play with those. We figured we can put them into the little vase area, so that when they mow the lawn, they won't be damaged. However, I am worried about water collected in it. We'll have to see. When we came to visit you, your brother first showed signs of allergies. Then I felt my nose running as well. Next time I came to visit you, I need to remember to bring my mask. Your brother was very interested in the pinwheels. When we first arrived, there wasn't any wind. But after we put the pinwheels in, the breeze picked up. It was nice to see the pinwheels moving.
After visiting you, we went for lunch and then headed to Fry's. Daddy didn't want to do anything special for Father's day, but just to spend time with family. So, what's a better place for all fathers in the Silicon Valley than Fry's, right? Your brother saw a boy playing Wii Fit there and got so into it. He stood there for a long time and ran with the boy when the boy was running. After the boy left, he was able to play for a little while. That reminded us that we haven't touched our Wii at home in a long, long time. Guess what, Daddy got Mommy (and himself, actually) the Wii Fit!!! Your brother spent 2 hours this afternoon playing all of the Wii Play and Wii sports games, and Mommy set up the account for Wii Fit and played for a while. Let's see if Wii Fit will help Mommy lose some weight.
We didn't get Daddy anything special for Father's Day, and since your brother wasn't in school, there wasn't any arts and crafts either. So, when the flight attendant offered your brother toys/activities on the plane, I spotted this picture frame thingy and I snatched it. We assembled that on the plane, and I put in a picture last night when I couldn't sleep. It made the perfect Father's Day present, made by your brother and Mommy. I know you wanted to give Daddy a present as well, and I am sure Daddy could feel your presence and love for him.
Oh, you know what, Auntie Goretti mailed Mommy a new rosary. She must have read my blog from before about how I gave you my rosay. That is so nice of her!! I am going to put this rosary in the car, where your rosary used to be.
Mommy has to sleep soon. I had less than 6 hours of sleep the last two days. If it weren't for my endorphins running after Wii Fit, I would be asleep already. Mommy will talk to you some more tomorrow.
Love you,
Mommy
What a beautiful day today for Father's Day! Did you like the new pinwheels and blue flowers that we brought to you today? It was interesting to try to put them into the soil. What about the little toys that Daddy saved for you? Your brother used to play with those. We figured we can put them into the little vase area, so that when they mow the lawn, they won't be damaged. However, I am worried about water collected in it. We'll have to see. When we came to visit you, your brother first showed signs of allergies. Then I felt my nose running as well. Next time I came to visit you, I need to remember to bring my mask. Your brother was very interested in the pinwheels. When we first arrived, there wasn't any wind. But after we put the pinwheels in, the breeze picked up. It was nice to see the pinwheels moving.
We didn't get Daddy anything special for Father's Day, and since your brother wasn't in school, there wasn't any arts and crafts either. So, when the flight attendant offered your brother toys/activities on the plane, I spotted this picture frame thingy and I snatched it. We assembled that on the plane, and I put in a picture last night when I couldn't sleep. It made the perfect Father's Day present, made by your brother and Mommy. I know you wanted to give Daddy a present as well, and I am sure Daddy could feel your presence and love for him.
Oh, you know what, Auntie Goretti mailed Mommy a new rosary. She must have read my blog from before about how I gave you my rosay. That is so nice of her!! I am going to put this rosary in the car, where your rosary used to be.
Love you,
Mommy
We're home and we can't sleep!
Hi Logan,
Mommy and big brother arrived home safe and sound. Aside from a couple poopy incidents that your big brother had (he always picked the right time to give Mommy headaches), the flight was uneventful, in a good way. This is mainly due to the nice technology we have these days, a touch-screen tv monitor at every seat! You know how much your big brother LOVES technology. That kept him happy for both flights watching and re-watching Spongebob Squarepants. Normally, I don't let him watch that show because I think he's still a little young for their 'violence'. But this time, I had no choice and luckily, this particular episode wasn't too bad. He actually slept nicely for 4.5 hours on the plane. Last time, I had him sleep like anyone, that is, sitting up straight. This time, I had him sleep like a kid should, to have him lie down and put his legs on me. He was semi-flat and semi-comfortable.
And you know what, of the 13 years I have left home and traveled back and forth Macau, I have never EVER once declared I had any food items. I don't know what got to me, but I actually told them I had some almond cookies in my luggage. I guess it was due to the fact that I was guilty in bringing stuff I shouldn't, and I was carrying food items with me (a dozen of egg tarts). So, I let them check my luggage and found my almond cookies (passed) but they also found my "chicken cakes" with meat in there (first time ever bought them), and my egg rolls with pork floss. Doh! Meat products, confiscated!! grr.... Luckily, I told them the food was only in one luggage and they didn't open the other ones. I really didn't know what got into me to be so honest!
We came home exhausted but were very happy to see Daddy. Mommy's cell phone battery died so I had to call Daddy after we came out. Luckily, Daddy was on his way and we live close to the airport. So, we didn't have to wait for long. I could see that your brother was getting really tired while waiting for dinner. I didn't want him to fall asleep while eating, so we gave him a bubble bath before dinner. Mommy and big brother both went to bed at 8 p.m. and he dozed off right away. We should have stayed awake for a little longer because we woke up at 1:30 a.m. and couldn't go back to sleep. It's 5 a.m. now and Mommy is online, while your big brother is standing next to me playing with my camera.
Hopefully, we both are able to stay awake for a little longer and maybe we can get your brother to come home to take a short afternoon nap, and reinstate his nap schedule.
We'll come see you later this morning. I'll see you real soon!
Love you,
Mommy
Mommy and big brother arrived home safe and sound. Aside from a couple poopy incidents that your big brother had (he always picked the right time to give Mommy headaches), the flight was uneventful, in a good way. This is mainly due to the nice technology we have these days, a touch-screen tv monitor at every seat! You know how much your big brother LOVES technology. That kept him happy for both flights watching and re-watching Spongebob Squarepants. Normally, I don't let him watch that show because I think he's still a little young for their 'violence'. But this time, I had no choice and luckily, this particular episode wasn't too bad. He actually slept nicely for 4.5 hours on the plane. Last time, I had him sleep like anyone, that is, sitting up straight. This time, I had him sleep like a kid should, to have him lie down and put his legs on me. He was semi-flat and semi-comfortable.
And you know what, of the 13 years I have left home and traveled back and forth Macau, I have never EVER once declared I had any food items. I don't know what got to me, but I actually told them I had some almond cookies in my luggage. I guess it was due to the fact that I was guilty in bringing stuff I shouldn't, and I was carrying food items with me (a dozen of egg tarts). So, I let them check my luggage and found my almond cookies (passed) but they also found my "chicken cakes" with meat in there (first time ever bought them), and my egg rolls with pork floss. Doh! Meat products, confiscated!! grr.... Luckily, I told them the food was only in one luggage and they didn't open the other ones. I really didn't know what got into me to be so honest!
We came home exhausted but were very happy to see Daddy. Mommy's cell phone battery died so I had to call Daddy after we came out. Luckily, Daddy was on his way and we live close to the airport. So, we didn't have to wait for long. I could see that your brother was getting really tired while waiting for dinner. I didn't want him to fall asleep while eating, so we gave him a bubble bath before dinner. Mommy and big brother both went to bed at 8 p.m. and he dozed off right away. We should have stayed awake for a little longer because we woke up at 1:30 a.m. and couldn't go back to sleep. It's 5 a.m. now and Mommy is online, while your big brother is standing next to me playing with my camera.
Hopefully, we both are able to stay awake for a little longer and maybe we can get your brother to come home to take a short afternoon nap, and reinstate his nap schedule.
We'll come see you later this morning. I'll see you real soon!
Love you,
Mommy
Friday, June 19, 2009
Final post in Macau.......at least for 2009
Dear Logan,
Tonight is our last night in Macau. In less than 12 hours, Mommy and big brother will be on the plane flying to Taipei, and then back to San Francisco. It's been a long, fun, memorable vacation for us. Mommy is really glad to make the decision to come back to Macau. It would be a perfect vacation if Daddy could have come with us. I bet Daddy can't wait to see us home!
It was a busy day today. Mommy had to buy some food to bring home, met up with relatives and family for a late lunch. Then we headed to Wynn Hotel, so that Auntie Mena could finally purchase that dream wallet from Gucci. Ouch, expensive! But it was subsidized by me and Ah Gung, because her birthday is coming up next week. Then we met up with Auntie Eliza and little Ethan for some fun at Hac Sa Playground. Your big brother got to ride the scooters again for half an hour, and run around the playground. He also got to ride little Ethan's Thomas the Train tricycle. Now that your brother is a little older (I think he's matured a little during this trip), Mommy could let him run around the playground by himself without following around. He knew where Mommy was, and would periodically check-in with me. I just needed to keep an eye on him from away. While doing so, Mommy was able to chat with Auntie Eliza, as Ethan played nearby.
After that, we headed to our long-expected, fancy buffet at Four Seasons Hotel. The food was good, but not super, duper exceptionally good. If you like cold seafood, esp. lobsters, then it was great. But I think the hot food selection was so-so. I think the best parts were the freshly- prepared pasta section and the dessert section. Your brother even asked for a second helping of pasta after he finished one. He was actually very hungry. He also had two slices of pizza (first and last pizzas in Macau). I think either he was super hungry, or the food was super tasty for him. He didn't even play his game or ipod during the meal, up until the very end when he's done eating. He was actually feeding himself! Wow! He really enjoyed the meal. And then the desserts. One of the best dessert sections I've been to. They have quite a variety of different desserts, and most of them were pretty delicious. And, I think their service was top-notch. I think this is the best service I've ever had at a buffet. Waiters and waitresses were attentive and polite, without being overbearing. No wonder everyone said their service was good.
Is the buffet worth $404? Well, that depends on how many lobsters you can eat, and how much you like seafood. It was a nice meal for all of us, and I am glad I was able to enjoy that with my beloved family.
After that, Uncle Carlos headed to work, Ah Gung, Ah Po and your big brother went home. Auntie Mena and Mommy went over to New Lisboa Casino to try our luck. Mommy was a conservative gambler and I was prepared to lose MOP$500, and that was my maximum. Luckily, Mommy was able to win a little, a grand total of MOP$200, while playing Big/Small and War. Enough for brunch tomorrow!
I think Mommy is almost done packing. Just need to charge all of my electronics tonight, in preparation for our long flight back home. Also need to pack some minor stuff tomorrow morning. Aside from that, I think we're all set. I am SURE I will forget to pack some stuff. Luckily, nothing is irreplaceable (most of the time).
Ok, honey. Mommy won't be able to write to you for the next day or two. I'll write and visit you when I get back home. For now, take care and watch over all of us. Make sure Mommy and your brother have a safe trip back home.
Love you,
Mommy
Tonight is our last night in Macau. In less than 12 hours, Mommy and big brother will be on the plane flying to Taipei, and then back to San Francisco. It's been a long, fun, memorable vacation for us. Mommy is really glad to make the decision to come back to Macau. It would be a perfect vacation if Daddy could have come with us. I bet Daddy can't wait to see us home!
It was a busy day today. Mommy had to buy some food to bring home, met up with relatives and family for a late lunch. Then we headed to Wynn Hotel, so that Auntie Mena could finally purchase that dream wallet from Gucci. Ouch, expensive! But it was subsidized by me and Ah Gung, because her birthday is coming up next week. Then we met up with Auntie Eliza and little Ethan for some fun at Hac Sa Playground. Your big brother got to ride the scooters again for half an hour, and run around the playground. He also got to ride little Ethan's Thomas the Train tricycle. Now that your brother is a little older (I think he's matured a little during this trip), Mommy could let him run around the playground by himself without following around. He knew where Mommy was, and would periodically check-in with me. I just needed to keep an eye on him from away. While doing so, Mommy was able to chat with Auntie Eliza, as Ethan played nearby.
After that, we headed to our long-expected, fancy buffet at Four Seasons Hotel. The food was good, but not super, duper exceptionally good. If you like cold seafood, esp. lobsters, then it was great. But I think the hot food selection was so-so. I think the best parts were the freshly- prepared pasta section and the dessert section. Your brother even asked for a second helping of pasta after he finished one. He was actually very hungry. He also had two slices of pizza (first and last pizzas in Macau). I think either he was super hungry, or the food was super tasty for him. He didn't even play his game or ipod during the meal, up until the very end when he's done eating. He was actually feeding himself! Wow! He really enjoyed the meal. And then the desserts. One of the best dessert sections I've been to. They have quite a variety of different desserts, and most of them were pretty delicious. And, I think their service was top-notch. I think this is the best service I've ever had at a buffet. Waiters and waitresses were attentive and polite, without being overbearing. No wonder everyone said their service was good.
Is the buffet worth $404? Well, that depends on how many lobsters you can eat, and how much you like seafood. It was a nice meal for all of us, and I am glad I was able to enjoy that with my beloved family.
After that, Uncle Carlos headed to work, Ah Gung, Ah Po and your big brother went home. Auntie Mena and Mommy went over to New Lisboa Casino to try our luck. Mommy was a conservative gambler and I was prepared to lose MOP$500, and that was my maximum. Luckily, Mommy was able to win a little, a grand total of MOP$200, while playing Big/Small and War. Enough for brunch tomorrow!
I think Mommy is almost done packing. Just need to charge all of my electronics tonight, in preparation for our long flight back home. Also need to pack some minor stuff tomorrow morning. Aside from that, I think we're all set. I am SURE I will forget to pack some stuff. Luckily, nothing is irreplaceable (most of the time).
Ok, honey. Mommy won't be able to write to you for the next day or two. I'll write and visit you when I get back home. For now, take care and watch over all of us. Make sure Mommy and your brother have a safe trip back home.
Love you,
Mommy
Thursday, June 18, 2009
What to do with all the lychees?
Dear Logan,
There are 5 big boxes of freshly-picked lychees here. What should we do with them all?
Grandaunt and uncle #3 and Granduncle #2 got us all these boxes of lychees from China, and drove them all the way to Macau today, thinking I could bring them back to the States. But But But... I can't!! Not unless I smuggle them in. The US doesn't permit bringing fruits and veggies to the country, and I would have to obtain a permit to do so. I am thinking, I will try my very best to bring as much as I can to Taipei, where I would be having a 5-hour layover, and eat them there. It's really too bad I couldn't bring them back home, so that Daddy could try them as well. What if I bag them in layers, and layers, and layers of newspaper so that the dogs couldn't smell them? Do you think that would work?
So Grandaunt and uncle #3 came with their son, your uncle. Unfortunately, Granduncle #2 came all the way down with them, and then when they're about to go through Customs, he noticed he brought the wrong identification cards! Doh! He had to take the bus back to Guangzhou all by himself. He's the one that had the connection to give us the yummy lychees, too! I felt so bad.
Mommy also visited the cemetery today to see your Great Grandparents and Grandaunt (Ah Gung's parents and sister). I told them to take care of you when they see you in Heaven. I wish they have found you and keep your company.
Mommy had a hard time falling asleep last night. One of the reasons was because I was missing you so much, after playing with my friend's baby girl. Mommy couldn't help but cried a little. Uncle Carlos asked me today if I would have another baby. I told him I don't know yet and we'll have to see the blood test results. Another reason I couldn't sleep was the constant itchiness from bug bites. I have no idea what they are but they have been biting your brother for a while, and last night it was super itchy for me. We sprayed the room and, get all the blankets and pillows out to the sun today, so hopefully, I won't get bitten tonight.
Tomorrow is going to be a busy day. Last full day in Macau and I will try to cramp as much activities in the day as possible. I told your brother that we would be leaving Ah Gung, Ah Po, Uncle Carlos and Auntie Mena soon, and will take the airplanes back home to see Daddy. He remembered we took 2 airplanes last time and was able to repeat what I said. I am not sure how he would feel this time around. Last time we left, he was too young to miss any of them. I remember he was holding Ah Gung and Ah Po especially tight at the airport, but didn't cry or anything. And then when Ah Gung and Ah Po left us back in February, he didn't cry either. This time around, we have spent a lot of time here, and he has had a lot of fun. I am not sure how he would feel once we're on the plane and it's just the two of us. Maybe he'll be fine, maybe not. However, one thing for sure is, if I give him his Gameboy, he will sit quietly on the plane.
It's getting late again. Time to get some sleep as a long day is ahead of me.
Love you,
Mommy
There are 5 big boxes of freshly-picked lychees here. What should we do with them all?
Grandaunt and uncle #3 and Granduncle #2 got us all these boxes of lychees from China, and drove them all the way to Macau today, thinking I could bring them back to the States. But But But... I can't!! Not unless I smuggle them in. The US doesn't permit bringing fruits and veggies to the country, and I would have to obtain a permit to do so. I am thinking, I will try my very best to bring as much as I can to Taipei, where I would be having a 5-hour layover, and eat them there. It's really too bad I couldn't bring them back home, so that Daddy could try them as well. What if I bag them in layers, and layers, and layers of newspaper so that the dogs couldn't smell them? Do you think that would work?
So Grandaunt and uncle #3 came with their son, your uncle. Unfortunately, Granduncle #2 came all the way down with them, and then when they're about to go through Customs, he noticed he brought the wrong identification cards! Doh! He had to take the bus back to Guangzhou all by himself. He's the one that had the connection to give us the yummy lychees, too! I felt so bad.
Mommy also visited the cemetery today to see your Great Grandparents and Grandaunt (Ah Gung's parents and sister). I told them to take care of you when they see you in Heaven. I wish they have found you and keep your company.
Mommy had a hard time falling asleep last night. One of the reasons was because I was missing you so much, after playing with my friend's baby girl. Mommy couldn't help but cried a little. Uncle Carlos asked me today if I would have another baby. I told him I don't know yet and we'll have to see the blood test results. Another reason I couldn't sleep was the constant itchiness from bug bites. I have no idea what they are but they have been biting your brother for a while, and last night it was super itchy for me. We sprayed the room and, get all the blankets and pillows out to the sun today, so hopefully, I won't get bitten tonight.
Tomorrow is going to be a busy day. Last full day in Macau and I will try to cramp as much activities in the day as possible. I told your brother that we would be leaving Ah Gung, Ah Po, Uncle Carlos and Auntie Mena soon, and will take the airplanes back home to see Daddy. He remembered we took 2 airplanes last time and was able to repeat what I said. I am not sure how he would feel this time around. Last time we left, he was too young to miss any of them. I remember he was holding Ah Gung and Ah Po especially tight at the airport, but didn't cry or anything. And then when Ah Gung and Ah Po left us back in February, he didn't cry either. This time around, we have spent a lot of time here, and he has had a lot of fun. I am not sure how he would feel once we're on the plane and it's just the two of us. Maybe he'll be fine, maybe not. However, one thing for sure is, if I give him his Gameboy, he will sit quietly on the plane.
It's getting late again. Time to get some sleep as a long day is ahead of me.
Love you,
Mommy
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Babies Babies
Hi Honey,
Mommy came home not too long ago from a long, hot pot dinner with some friends. It was long because we all ate and chatted the night away. Mommy has known these two uncles since I was in Form 5 (11th Grade), and we used to hang out until it's pretty 'early' in the morning. We were talking about our good ole days, gossip a little, and did some baby talk. One uncle brought his wife and his little 3-month old daughter. She is so adorable. Mommy actually has met this little girl a few times now, but it's the first time I got to hold her, since we had such a small group tonight. It was an amazing feeling to hold her. Even before she is 3 months old, she had amazing neck control. When I first met her, she's only 2.5 months and she could hold her head high. In fact, she prefers being in a vertical position, than horizontal. She was smiling and talking to me. Her little cooing was just so adorable. At that moment, Mommy missed you big time. And for a very short split second, I wish I could be pregnant again and have another baby.
She was the same age as when you were home in between the two hospitalizations. You were just as cute then. But I couldn't get a smile out of you, and you didn't coo much. I never got much eye contact, and your neck was always floppy. It was such a big difference. Mommy misses holding you.
During our conversation, I briefly mentioned about my two hospitalizations at Kaiser giving birth. This uncle and his wife didn't know about you. I didn't give them any details, I thought words have already spread and they would have known. I just said you've been gone two months. The other uncle directed them to my Facebook page. It was such a long story I didn't know how to begin. If they had known, I wouldn't mind talking about it. But telling your story from the very beginning is a little difficult.
On the other hand, I read a story about this woman faking her pregnancy and giving birth to a terminally ill baby. My initial reaction was, what a moron! How could you fake something like this?? But then, once I calmed down, I started to think: she did lose a baby back in 2005, was it Post-Traumatic Stress Disordern, Munchausen by Proxy Syndrome, or any other kind of mental illness? No normal person who do such a heinous thing. Something has got to be wrong here, right? She said her lie got out of hand and she didn't know what to do. But, why would you do that in the first place? I don't know, but I am glad people eventually found out it's a hoax.
I guess we really can't believe everything we read on the internet. It would be naive to do so anyway.
Don't forget to keep praying for mommy's pregnant friend and her family. You're closer to God than me, so you need to put in a good word, ok?
Miss you,
Mommy
Mommy came home not too long ago from a long, hot pot dinner with some friends. It was long because we all ate and chatted the night away. Mommy has known these two uncles since I was in Form 5 (11th Grade), and we used to hang out until it's pretty 'early' in the morning. We were talking about our good ole days, gossip a little, and did some baby talk. One uncle brought his wife and his little 3-month old daughter. She is so adorable. Mommy actually has met this little girl a few times now, but it's the first time I got to hold her, since we had such a small group tonight. It was an amazing feeling to hold her. Even before she is 3 months old, she had amazing neck control. When I first met her, she's only 2.5 months and she could hold her head high. In fact, she prefers being in a vertical position, than horizontal. She was smiling and talking to me. Her little cooing was just so adorable. At that moment, Mommy missed you big time. And for a very short split second, I wish I could be pregnant again and have another baby.
She was the same age as when you were home in between the two hospitalizations. You were just as cute then. But I couldn't get a smile out of you, and you didn't coo much. I never got much eye contact, and your neck was always floppy. It was such a big difference. Mommy misses holding you.
During our conversation, I briefly mentioned about my two hospitalizations at Kaiser giving birth. This uncle and his wife didn't know about you. I didn't give them any details, I thought words have already spread and they would have known. I just said you've been gone two months. The other uncle directed them to my Facebook page. It was such a long story I didn't know how to begin. If they had known, I wouldn't mind talking about it. But telling your story from the very beginning is a little difficult.
On the other hand, I read a story about this woman faking her pregnancy and giving birth to a terminally ill baby. My initial reaction was, what a moron! How could you fake something like this?? But then, once I calmed down, I started to think: she did lose a baby back in 2005, was it Post-Traumatic Stress Disordern, Munchausen by Proxy Syndrome, or any other kind of mental illness? No normal person who do such a heinous thing. Something has got to be wrong here, right? She said her lie got out of hand and she didn't know what to do. But, why would you do that in the first place? I don't know, but I am glad people eventually found out it's a hoax.
I guess we really can't believe everything we read on the internet. It would be naive to do so anyway.
Don't forget to keep praying for mommy's pregnant friend and her family. You're closer to God than me, so you need to put in a good word, ok?
Miss you,
Mommy
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Windmills and Good Friends - Happy 7 months old!
Dear Logan,
Mommy didn't get home till 3:30 a.m. this morning, so I was too tired to blog afterwards. Mommy went over to my friends' house to chat. Remember the auntie and uncle I told you about that were expecting amniocentesis results for their baby? I finally got to chat with them. I stayed at their house until 2 a.m. and then when uncle drove me home, we chatted a little more in the car.
Of course, we talked about you. I shared with them my your story and they shared with me their story. They were so strong, and I am so happy that they kind of know what they would do. I might choose to do the same option, if I were them. If they don't hear from the doctor within the next few days, or next week, then everything would be fine. Then, we would be be able to let out a HUGE sigh of relief, and they would be able to enjoy the rest of the pregnancy. After this "big test" from God, all the future pain from contractions would be nothing. Uncle and Auntie have gone through a lot in their lives. Auntie has mentioned that it seems like all that she has gone through, her parents' illnesses and deaths, were to prepare her for this big test. They both have strong faith in God, that whatever happened, it's God's will. I also shared that, without you, my dear Logan, Mommy would not have discovered the love that everyone showed us. Everything happened for a reason.
We also shared stories of when we were in Hawaii for college. Those were the good old days. They shared some secrets that I never knew, even though I've lived with them. Of course, we also shared some gossip about others. It was nice to end the night on a lighter note. I am happy that uncle and auntie treated me as good friends, and shared such intimate moments of their lives with me. I don't see these friends often, but when we do meet up, it just feels like we're back in our good old college days. Life back then was so much more simple. We were young and naive.
Oh honey, you're 8 months old today! You know what, Mommy has been trying to find you some windmills that I saw at your 'nearby neighbor' house'. I wanted to get you some and I thought, Macau would be a good place to get them. Mommy and Ah Gung, esp. Ah Gung, went to many stores and couldn't find them. Then yesterday, when we're browsing at the supermarket at Yaohan, and your brother was happily riding in the shopping cart-car, we turned a corner and I spotted these lovely ones at the top of the shelves. I've been to this supermarket many, many times, and I have never seen them. But yesterday, at your 2-month passing, I spotted them at the most unlikely place. Mommy was so happy!
Then, just now, Ah Gung brought home these even more lovely ones, right on your 7-month birthday. Granduncle #7 saw these and bought them for you. Ah Gung showed me to make sure these are the ones that I am looking for (I told them I don't want the ugly red ones). Sure enough, these are the ones, and Ah Gung called Granduncle #7 to buy 6 more.
The trouble we have gone through to get these! But I saw these and I thought they would look lovely at your house. They are plastic and sould last in the rain and sun. Such great timing!
Mommy will be home in a few days, and I'll bring them to your new house, ok? Gotta go now, take care honey.
Love you,
Mommy
Mommy didn't get home till 3:30 a.m. this morning, so I was too tired to blog afterwards. Mommy went over to my friends' house to chat. Remember the auntie and uncle I told you about that were expecting amniocentesis results for their baby? I finally got to chat with them. I stayed at their house until 2 a.m. and then when uncle drove me home, we chatted a little more in the car.
Of course, we talked about you. I shared with them my your story and they shared with me their story. They were so strong, and I am so happy that they kind of know what they would do. I might choose to do the same option, if I were them. If they don't hear from the doctor within the next few days, or next week, then everything would be fine. Then, we would be be able to let out a HUGE sigh of relief, and they would be able to enjoy the rest of the pregnancy. After this "big test" from God, all the future pain from contractions would be nothing. Uncle and Auntie have gone through a lot in their lives. Auntie has mentioned that it seems like all that she has gone through, her parents' illnesses and deaths, were to prepare her for this big test. They both have strong faith in God, that whatever happened, it's God's will. I also shared that, without you, my dear Logan, Mommy would not have discovered the love that everyone showed us. Everything happened for a reason.
We also shared stories of when we were in Hawaii for college. Those were the good old days. They shared some secrets that I never knew, even though I've lived with them. Of course, we also shared some gossip about others. It was nice to end the night on a lighter note. I am happy that uncle and auntie treated me as good friends, and shared such intimate moments of their lives with me. I don't see these friends often, but when we do meet up, it just feels like we're back in our good old college days. Life back then was so much more simple. We were young and naive.
Oh honey, you're 8 months old today! You know what, Mommy has been trying to find you some windmills that I saw at your 'nearby neighbor' house'. I wanted to get you some and I thought, Macau would be a good place to get them. Mommy and Ah Gung, esp. Ah Gung, went to many stores and couldn't find them. Then yesterday, when we're browsing at the supermarket at Yaohan, and your brother was happily riding in the shopping cart-car, we turned a corner and I spotted these lovely ones at the top of the shelves. I've been to this supermarket many, many times, and I have never seen them. But yesterday, at your 2-month passing, I spotted them at the most unlikely place. Mommy was so happy!
Then, just now, Ah Gung brought home these even more lovely ones, right on your 7-month birthday. Granduncle #7 saw these and bought them for you. Ah Gung showed me to make sure these are the ones that I am looking for (I told them I don't want the ugly red ones). Sure enough, these are the ones, and Ah Gung called Granduncle #7 to buy 6 more.
The trouble we have gone through to get these! But I saw these and I thought they would look lovely at your house. They are plastic and sould last in the rain and sun. Such great timing!
Mommy will be home in a few days, and I'll bring them to your new house, ok? Gotta go now, take care honey.
Love you,
Mommy
Monday, June 15, 2009
A year Older but am I a year Wiser?
Hi Honey,
Mommy is ready to type away and tell you all the fun things that I did yesterday on my birthday.
Everybody got up early for various reasons. The main reason was because they had to go to Sunday mass at 9:30 a.m., and we had to cut the birthday cake before mass started. So we all got up early, including a very sleepy Mommy who slept way too late the night before. Auntie Mena bought Mommy a delicious Haagen-daz ice-cream birthday cake. Ice-cream early in the morning! Of course, your brother is always very excited when there's ice-cream and blowing out candles involved.
After that, the rest of them, excluding Mommy and big brother, went to Church. After Church, we're picked up to go to Taipa for dim sum, while Ah Gung and Uncle Carlos tried to buy the cheap MOP$38-fan at Fisherman's Wharf (they were sold out the day before, but they were still sold out, even though they waited in line before the store opened). Mommy and big brother met up with a bunch of friends and their little ones for dim sum. We went to the Chinese restaurant at Grand Waldo Hotel, because afterwards we're heading to the spa next door. Since the restaurant doesn't take reservations for Sunday dim sum, we got there at 11 a.m. to get a big table for 14 ppl. We're lucky to only have to wait for 5 minutes, and was able to get a big table. Mommy gave your brother his gameboy to keep him happy while we waited for our friends to arrive. It was nice to see all the kids there as well. We were able to take a lot of pictures at the end of the meal. Your brother was most excited when he was playing with my camera. Since each family had a camera, Aidan was more 'encouraged' and kept on taking pictures of all the uncles and aunties, and the little kids. Aidan was the oldest of the bunch. Considering we're at the restaurant for two hours, your brother was pretty well-behaved.
We then headed over to the Spa. The rest of the family (Ah Gung, Ah Po, Uncle Carlos, Auntie Mena, Grandaunts #6 and #7, and your two aunties) were already there. There were a lot of stuff to do there, some weren't included in the entrance fee (MOP$188+15%), but some were. We first headed up to the restaurant for some lunch, which would be food served all day buffet-style. The lunch wasn't that great, in my opinion. While we're there, your aunties and big brother were already on the computers. Kids these days! Then we went to the 5th floor to explore the Children's area. You can see from the pictures all the different activities: Arcade games, slide, children's area, pool (costs extra $25/hr), ping pong table and an outdoor play area. It was raining periodically that day, so we were unable to go out and play.
After that, Mommy, Uncle Carlos and Auntie Mena went to the spa for our facials and massages (cost extra $). By now, Mommy should be used to the comments that Chinese people make when they see my enormous body. But that doesn't mean it didn't bother me. After the facial, we went to the aromatheraphy massage pool/sauna area. Since it's divided into the men's and women's sections, I was unable to accompany your brother. I was told that he was dipping his hands into the hot and cold pools, running back and forth and having a lot of fun. We spent some time down there, showered and then it's time for dinner. Dinner definitely was better than lunch. At that time, I was starving already! After dinner, we rented a large VIP room so that the "older" generation could play some automatic tile-piling Mahjong (it was so cool), and us "younger" ones sang Karaoke. It was only MOP$60 an hour and it was worth it. Your brother at the time was getting tired, but he fed himself enough fruits and orange juice to keep the energy level up. We left the spa at around 11 p.m., spending almost 11 hours there (we could only stay for 12 hrs without getting charged extra). By the time we got home, we all felt that we were back from a day-trip somewhere else.
It was such a tiring day that we all slept in this morning. Your brother slept from around midnight to 10 a.m., and I didn't get up until 11 a.m. He had so much fun that he cried twice in his sleep last night because of all the fun. I vaguely remember he said "Stop pushing me" in his sleep. It was a really fun day with friends and family. Looking back, I don't think I've ever spent my birthday in Macau since I left for college in 1996. Wow, that's a good 13 years!!
As for tonight, Mommy just got home from dinner and some bubble tea with friends. I didn't bring your brother with me tonight. It was nice to catch up with friends and to chat without worrying about kids. No kids tonight!
One more thing is, my pregnant friend who I've been praying for, wanted to reach out to me and chat. We didn't have time today, but we're meet at another time. I am so glad she wanted to talk. I haven't told her that I kind of know what she wants to talk about, but we'll have plenty of time to do so, if she chooses to. She is waiting for news of her amniocentesis. The doctor said it will take 3-4 days, and if she doesn't hear from them, then it's good news. Let's pray she doesn't hear from her doctor!!
That's it for now. Tomorrow is the 15th again in the States. That means you have left us for 2 months already. Time sure does fly.
Miss you,
Mommy
Mommy is ready to type away and tell you all the fun things that I did yesterday on my birthday.
Everybody got up early for various reasons. The main reason was because they had to go to Sunday mass at 9:30 a.m., and we had to cut the birthday cake before mass started. So we all got up early, including a very sleepy Mommy who slept way too late the night before. Auntie Mena bought Mommy a delicious Haagen-daz ice-cream birthday cake. Ice-cream early in the morning! Of course, your brother is always very excited when there's ice-cream and blowing out candles involved.
After that, the rest of them, excluding Mommy and big brother, went to Church. After Church, we're picked up to go to Taipa for dim sum, while Ah Gung and Uncle Carlos tried to buy the cheap MOP$38-fan at Fisherman's Wharf (they were sold out the day before, but they were still sold out, even though they waited in line before the store opened). Mommy and big brother met up with a bunch of friends and their little ones for dim sum. We went to the Chinese restaurant at Grand Waldo Hotel, because afterwards we're heading to the spa next door. Since the restaurant doesn't take reservations for Sunday dim sum, we got there at 11 a.m. to get a big table for 14 ppl. We're lucky to only have to wait for 5 minutes, and was able to get a big table. Mommy gave your brother his gameboy to keep him happy while we waited for our friends to arrive. It was nice to see all the kids there as well. We were able to take a lot of pictures at the end of the meal. Your brother was most excited when he was playing with my camera. Since each family had a camera, Aidan was more 'encouraged' and kept on taking pictures of all the uncles and aunties, and the little kids. Aidan was the oldest of the bunch. Considering we're at the restaurant for two hours, your brother was pretty well-behaved.
We then headed over to the Spa. The rest of the family (Ah Gung, Ah Po, Uncle Carlos, Auntie Mena, Grandaunts #6 and #7, and your two aunties) were already there. There were a lot of stuff to do there, some weren't included in the entrance fee (MOP$188+15%), but some were. We first headed up to the restaurant for some lunch, which would be food served all day buffet-style. The lunch wasn't that great, in my opinion. While we're there, your aunties and big brother were already on the computers. Kids these days! Then we went to the 5th floor to explore the Children's area. You can see from the pictures all the different activities: Arcade games, slide, children's area, pool (costs extra $25/hr), ping pong table and an outdoor play area. It was raining periodically that day, so we were unable to go out and play.
After that, Mommy, Uncle Carlos and Auntie Mena went to the spa for our facials and massages (cost extra $). By now, Mommy should be used to the comments that Chinese people make when they see my enormous body. But that doesn't mean it didn't bother me. After the facial, we went to the aromatheraphy massage pool/sauna area. Since it's divided into the men's and women's sections, I was unable to accompany your brother. I was told that he was dipping his hands into the hot and cold pools, running back and forth and having a lot of fun. We spent some time down there, showered and then it's time for dinner. Dinner definitely was better than lunch. At that time, I was starving already! After dinner, we rented a large VIP room so that the "older" generation could play some automatic tile-piling Mahjong (it was so cool), and us "younger" ones sang Karaoke. It was only MOP$60 an hour and it was worth it. Your brother at the time was getting tired, but he fed himself enough fruits and orange juice to keep the energy level up. We left the spa at around 11 p.m., spending almost 11 hours there (we could only stay for 12 hrs without getting charged extra). By the time we got home, we all felt that we were back from a day-trip somewhere else.
It was such a tiring day that we all slept in this morning. Your brother slept from around midnight to 10 a.m., and I didn't get up until 11 a.m. He had so much fun that he cried twice in his sleep last night because of all the fun. I vaguely remember he said "Stop pushing me" in his sleep. It was a really fun day with friends and family. Looking back, I don't think I've ever spent my birthday in Macau since I left for college in 1996. Wow, that's a good 13 years!!
As for tonight, Mommy just got home from dinner and some bubble tea with friends. I didn't bring your brother with me tonight. It was nice to catch up with friends and to chat without worrying about kids. No kids tonight!
One more thing is, my pregnant friend who I've been praying for, wanted to reach out to me and chat. We didn't have time today, but we're meet at another time. I am so glad she wanted to talk. I haven't told her that I kind of know what she wants to talk about, but we'll have plenty of time to do so, if she chooses to. She is waiting for news of her amniocentesis. The doctor said it will take 3-4 days, and if she doesn't hear from them, then it's good news. Let's pray she doesn't hear from her doctor!!
That's it for now. Tomorrow is the 15th again in the States. That means you have left us for 2 months already. Time sure does fly.
Miss you,
Mommy
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Had a fabulous birthday but too tired to blog
Hi Honey,
Mommy had a fabulous birthday but I am really tired. I promise I will tell you all about it tomorrow after I have a nice, long, beauty sleep. Ok?
Love you,
Mommy
Mommy had a fabulous birthday but I am really tired. I promise I will tell you all about it tomorrow after I have a nice, long, beauty sleep. Ok?
Love you,
Mommy
Saturday, June 13, 2009
I dreamt of you
Dear Logan,
Mommy had a first dream of you last night...it's more like early this morning. I think I saw you in an open casket, just like you were sleeping. There were people who were trying to bury you. But before they could dig up some dirt with their shovels and pour that onto you, you opened your eyes. I told them to stop and told them you're awake. You looked like you woke up from your sleep, cried a little, and then looked around. You were as if checking out the environment, trying to figure out what was going on. Then, your big brother woke me up. I think I tried to go back to sleep to see you again, but before I could dream again, your brother woke me up again. When I was awake, I didn't feel sad. I told myself, I saw Logan. This is my first time dreaming of you. I told myself I have to blog about this dream, so that I will never forget about it. I remember your eyes were so wide-opened, just like when you were at home, looking around.
Maybe it's all the baby news, and the news of my friend's baby that prompted me to miss you even more. Or maybe, you know it's Mommy's birthday, and you wanted to surprise me and say "Happy Birthday". Or maybe, Mommy subconsciously misses you a lot, even though consciously I am pre-occupied with taking care of your brother. Whatever the reason it may be, I am glad that I saw your face again.
Today was a good day. I spent time with family and friends. We went to Fisherman's Wharf with Ah Gung, Ah Po, Auntie Mena and big brother for dim sum, played a little and walked around. At night, Mommy had dinner with Father Conroy and some friends from Church. During Father's homily, I thought of you. I thought of how you have brought me closer to God again. Mommy has abandoned God the last few years because of all these excuses. But because of you, I am closer to God again. I remember Father said, his prayers are for Mommy and all of us here, not especially for you, because you are already in good hands. It's us that need the extra support. He is right. You are in a better and happier place. You are our little guardian angel.
Time for Mommy to sleep. Tomorrow will be a very busy day. I will tell you all about Mommy's birthday celebration tomorrow.
Miss you,
Mommy
Mommy had a first dream of you last night...it's more like early this morning. I think I saw you in an open casket, just like you were sleeping. There were people who were trying to bury you. But before they could dig up some dirt with their shovels and pour that onto you, you opened your eyes. I told them to stop and told them you're awake. You looked like you woke up from your sleep, cried a little, and then looked around. You were as if checking out the environment, trying to figure out what was going on. Then, your big brother woke me up. I think I tried to go back to sleep to see you again, but before I could dream again, your brother woke me up again. When I was awake, I didn't feel sad. I told myself, I saw Logan. This is my first time dreaming of you. I told myself I have to blog about this dream, so that I will never forget about it. I remember your eyes were so wide-opened, just like when you were at home, looking around.
Maybe it's all the baby news, and the news of my friend's baby that prompted me to miss you even more. Or maybe, you know it's Mommy's birthday, and you wanted to surprise me and say "Happy Birthday". Or maybe, Mommy subconsciously misses you a lot, even though consciously I am pre-occupied with taking care of your brother. Whatever the reason it may be, I am glad that I saw your face again.
Today was a good day. I spent time with family and friends. We went to Fisherman's Wharf with Ah Gung, Ah Po, Auntie Mena and big brother for dim sum, played a little and walked around. At night, Mommy had dinner with Father Conroy and some friends from Church. During Father's homily, I thought of you. I thought of how you have brought me closer to God again. Mommy has abandoned God the last few years because of all these excuses. But because of you, I am closer to God again. I remember Father said, his prayers are for Mommy and all of us here, not especially for you, because you are already in good hands. It's us that need the extra support. He is right. You are in a better and happier place. You are our little guardian angel.
Time for Mommy to sleep. Tomorrow will be a very busy day. I will tell you all about Mommy's birthday celebration tomorrow.
Miss you,
Mommy
Friday, June 12, 2009
What's up with our children?
Hi Logan,
I couldn't help but think and read about Edwards Syndrome. It's just as bad as Leigh's Disease. Mommy is so sad to hear about the news. At least if Mommy's friend's baby has Down Syndrome, the survival rate is a lot higher. But with Edwards Syndrome, the survival rate is close to none. I am not sure what my friend would do. Will she abort the baby? Will she try her luck and keep it as long as possible? I don't know, and there is no right or wrong answer.
I heard about the baby's news through another friend. I don't think my friend knows that I knew about it. I do not dare contacting her. This is very personal business, and if she doesn't share, I don't want to embarrass her or bother her during such a difficult time. I have thought of e-mailing her to tell her that I understand how she feels, and will be here for her if she ever wants to talk. But remembering the days after your diagnosis, I didn't feel like talking to anyone, though I have made my blog public, so friends and family knew about it. I have received numerous emails and phone calls, and I was grateful for them. However, I didn't want to talk to anyone. I fear I would cry, and I really didn't know what to say. Writing was much better for me. I know my friend finds solace and guidance from reading the Bible. I wish God will give her and her family all the strength that they need during this difficult time. Logan, if this little baby does make its way to heaven, be sure to keep him/her company.
Another of my friend's toddler is fighting a rare form of cancer. Thank goodness he is responding well to treatments!! But what's up with all these rare forms of illnesses? Shouldn't parents just worry about colds and flus, fevers and stomach aches? We shouldn't be worrying about cancers, chromosomal disorders or genetic diseases.
Logan, since you're closer to God than I am, please ask him to give all of my friends and their families, especially their children, the strength to deal with all the obstacles that they are facing.
Will you pray with Mommy, The Serenity Prayer?
I couldn't help but think and read about Edwards Syndrome. It's just as bad as Leigh's Disease. Mommy is so sad to hear about the news. At least if Mommy's friend's baby has Down Syndrome, the survival rate is a lot higher. But with Edwards Syndrome, the survival rate is close to none. I am not sure what my friend would do. Will she abort the baby? Will she try her luck and keep it as long as possible? I don't know, and there is no right or wrong answer.
I heard about the baby's news through another friend. I don't think my friend knows that I knew about it. I do not dare contacting her. This is very personal business, and if she doesn't share, I don't want to embarrass her or bother her during such a difficult time. I have thought of e-mailing her to tell her that I understand how she feels, and will be here for her if she ever wants to talk. But remembering the days after your diagnosis, I didn't feel like talking to anyone, though I have made my blog public, so friends and family knew about it. I have received numerous emails and phone calls, and I was grateful for them. However, I didn't want to talk to anyone. I fear I would cry, and I really didn't know what to say. Writing was much better for me. I know my friend finds solace and guidance from reading the Bible. I wish God will give her and her family all the strength that they need during this difficult time. Logan, if this little baby does make its way to heaven, be sure to keep him/her company.
Another of my friend's toddler is fighting a rare form of cancer. Thank goodness he is responding well to treatments!! But what's up with all these rare forms of illnesses? Shouldn't parents just worry about colds and flus, fevers and stomach aches? We shouldn't be worrying about cancers, chromosomal disorders or genetic diseases.
Logan, since you're closer to God than I am, please ask him to give all of my friends and their families, especially their children, the strength to deal with all the obstacles that they are facing.
Will you pray with Mommy, The Serenity Prayer?
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.
Love you,
Mommy
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Baby news!
Hello Baby,
Mommy got an email from an auntie (anonymous for now) that she's expecting twins! Mommy is soooo happy for auntie and uncle. Last time, they tried for years and with a lot of hard work to be able to conceive. This time around, it is so much faster. It's also very sweet of auntie to email me before I find out the news on Facebook! She is 4 months pregnant now and is already showing. She knows that friends will find out in a few days when she attends a bbq, and words will surely spread. She doesn't know the sex of the babies until next month. Let's hope one of the twins is a baby girl. Ohh..the pretty, pink, adorable girls clothes!
On the other hand, one of mommy's other friend received some bad news about her baby. She received news that her baby has 1/60th chance of having Down Syndrome. She will have to go through the aminiotic fluid test for further information, and I have a pretty good idea how she's feeling at the moment. It must be like the news I received when I knew you might have a Mitochondrial Disease: not as shocking, but definitely shocking. She will definitely need to think and communicate with her husband whether to keep the baby, and the realities of having a baby with a disorder.
I remember when I was pregnant with you, I told my Ob/Gyn that I didn't need to do the amniotic fluid test, because even if you have a disability, I will never abort you. That was a very emotional decision, and I never really had a heart-to-heart conversation with Daddy beforehand. I know Daddy will support my decision, whatever it is. Working with people with Down Syndrome, I know that life would not be easy, but it could be fulfilling and full of love. That's why I don't hesitate with that decision. When I knew of your diagnosis, do you know how much I wish you had Down Syndrome? How much I wish all you have was Epilepsy, or any developemental disability? Any of those was a much better diagnosis than Leigh's Disease.
Everytime I hear of a baby news, I thought of you. And I am so sad to hear about my friend's news. I've been praying for her baby ever since I heard the news. I wish every baby would be born healthy. I wish none of my friends, or anyone, to have to go through what I have. Logan, will you be so kind to watch over all these babies? Make sure they are born healthy and strong?
When Mommy goes back home, I will have a baby shower to attend. I am sure I will think of you as well, especially, when I see all the cute baby clothes that they will be receiving. It will be bittersweet. I am happy for them, but I am sad for me. I still browse through baby products once in a while, both online and at stores. Shopping for their babies is a mother's ultimate joy.
Mommy's birthday is coming up. And a day after that, marks the day you left us for 2 months. And a day after that, you would have been 7 months old. From now on, June 14, 15, and 16 would never be the same to me anymore.
Miss you,
Mommy
Mommy got an email from an auntie (anonymous for now) that she's expecting twins! Mommy is soooo happy for auntie and uncle. Last time, they tried for years and with a lot of hard work to be able to conceive. This time around, it is so much faster. It's also very sweet of auntie to email me before I find out the news on Facebook! She is 4 months pregnant now and is already showing. She knows that friends will find out in a few days when she attends a bbq, and words will surely spread. She doesn't know the sex of the babies until next month. Let's hope one of the twins is a baby girl. Ohh..the pretty, pink, adorable girls clothes!
On the other hand, one of mommy's other friend received some bad news about her baby. She received news that her baby has 1/60th chance of having Down Syndrome. She will have to go through the aminiotic fluid test for further information, and I have a pretty good idea how she's feeling at the moment. It must be like the news I received when I knew you might have a Mitochondrial Disease: not as shocking, but definitely shocking. She will definitely need to think and communicate with her husband whether to keep the baby, and the realities of having a baby with a disorder.
I remember when I was pregnant with you, I told my Ob/Gyn that I didn't need to do the amniotic fluid test, because even if you have a disability, I will never abort you. That was a very emotional decision, and I never really had a heart-to-heart conversation with Daddy beforehand. I know Daddy will support my decision, whatever it is. Working with people with Down Syndrome, I know that life would not be easy, but it could be fulfilling and full of love. That's why I don't hesitate with that decision. When I knew of your diagnosis, do you know how much I wish you had Down Syndrome? How much I wish all you have was Epilepsy, or any developemental disability? Any of those was a much better diagnosis than Leigh's Disease.
Everytime I hear of a baby news, I thought of you. And I am so sad to hear about my friend's news. I've been praying for her baby ever since I heard the news. I wish every baby would be born healthy. I wish none of my friends, or anyone, to have to go through what I have. Logan, will you be so kind to watch over all these babies? Make sure they are born healthy and strong?
When Mommy goes back home, I will have a baby shower to attend. I am sure I will think of you as well, especially, when I see all the cute baby clothes that they will be receiving. It will be bittersweet. I am happy for them, but I am sad for me. I still browse through baby products once in a while, both online and at stores. Shopping for their babies is a mother's ultimate joy.
Mommy's birthday is coming up. And a day after that, marks the day you left us for 2 months. And a day after that, you would have been 7 months old. From now on, June 14, 15, and 16 would never be the same to me anymore.
Miss you,
Mommy
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
What a Mom will do for a Sale!
Hello Sweetheart,
Today is a day of shopping and food. Mommy was going to get up early today and head over to New Yaohan department store for their VIP sale day. Of course, I didn't really get up early. I don't think 9:45 a.m. is considered early anyways. At first I thought I would leave your brother home with Ah Gung and Ah Po, and then I would brave the crowd to buy some bedding for your brother. We ended up all going together, during lunchtime when billions of people were there. I heard there were 30 people waiting in line at 8 a.m., when the store doesn't open until 10:30 a.m. There were so many people in there, and I felt like I was shopping on the busiest floor. It definitely reminded me of Black Friday sales. However, Black Friday craziness started a lot earlier, but also ended a lot earlier. We actually went back to the department store after dinner, and there were still a lot of people in there at 9 p.m.
Today is a day of shopping and food. Mommy was going to get up early today and head over to New Yaohan department store for their VIP sale day. Of course, I didn't really get up early. I don't think 9:45 a.m. is considered early anyways. At first I thought I would leave your brother home with Ah Gung and Ah Po, and then I would brave the crowd to buy some bedding for your brother. We ended up all going together, during lunchtime when billions of people were there. I heard there were 30 people waiting in line at 8 a.m., when the store doesn't open until 10:30 a.m. There were so many people in there, and I felt like I was shopping on the busiest floor. It definitely reminded me of Black Friday sales. However, Black Friday craziness started a lot earlier, but also ended a lot earlier. We actually went back to the department store after dinner, and there were still a lot of people in there at 9 p.m.
The crazy crowd pushing and shoving
Mommy waiting in line to pay (Ah Gung brought me a snackie)!
So, when we got there, of course someone had to entertain your brother. Everytime we go to Yaohan, he kills time by going up and down the escalator. Even though there were a lot of people, it didn't stop him from doing that. However, when we first got there, Ah Gung was parking, and Mommy, Ah Po and your brother headed over to the Disney bedding section. Your poor brother was scared of the crowd, and I think he was definitely overwhelmed. He wanted me to hold him, while I was fighting with lots of people. I wanted to get a set of pillow cases/comforter/sheet of the movie CARS for your brother, but the Twin size sets were all sold out. I could get a raincheck but it won't be available for another 2 weeks. I would be gone by then, and it's not cheap anymore if I have to have it mailed to us. So, I got your brother a Mickey Mouse Clubhouse set (MOP$288) instead, but I got him another set of pillow cases/sheet of CARS (MOP$139).
The worst part was I had to wait in line for an hour to pay for the merchandise. Then with my receipt, I went back to pick up the stuff. Luckily, they had sufficient a/c on, if not, you know your mommy would just drench in sweat. While I was waiting in line, Ah Gung and Ah Po took your brother to the supermarket level and waited. The supermarket was packed as well, and you had to wait in line to get in. It was total craziness! Luckily, Ah Po was able to find a seat and could sit and wait for me.
At night, we went to this tiny, pretty unknown Portuguese restaurant in Taipa. They have pretty authentic Portuguese food. We ordered similar food as last time when we were at A Lorcha. We had a mixed salad, cabbage and mashed potato soup with Portugese sausages, Lamb Chops, Stir Fried Bacalhau with eggs and onions, and the Seafood rice. The mixed salad was the best salad I've ever had in Macau. I liked the Bacalhau the best, with just the right combination of all ingredients. A lot of places use too much eggs, and don't give you enough fish. This one is perfect! The soup for some reason tasted a little sour to me. The lamb chops were average, and the seafood rice was just as good as A Lorcha.
We ended our dinner with some McD ice-cream for your brother. I spotted a Haagan-daz next to Mc. D, so Ah Gung and I got some expensive ice-cream there instead. Then it's time to pick up Auntie Mena from school. We headed over to the department store again. Ah Gung and Ah Po bought two suitcases. It was a pretty good deal. I believe it was MOP$569 for one 20" and one 26". They got a raincheck and will pick up the merchandise later. Auntie Mena really wanted to buy a Mickey Mouse suitcase. She was THIS close to buying. If Ah Gung and Ah Po weren't there, I think she would have bought it. But Ah Po was really tired, so we left instead. Besides, your brother was so tired, he wasn't listening and was running around. He came home, took a shower and immediately went to bed.
It's been too much excitement. Tomorrow will be another calmer day before the weekend festivities start! I think Mommy will definitely sleep in again tomorrow, unless your brother decides to jump on me again. He likes to abuse me when I am sleeping.
Mommy will talk to you some more tomorrow. Take care, honey.
Love you,
Mommy
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