Babies Babies

Hi Honey,

Mommy came home not too long ago from a long, hot pot dinner with some friends. It was long because we all ate and chatted the night away. Mommy has known these two uncles since I was in Form 5 (11th Grade), and we used to hang out until it's pretty 'early' in the morning. We were talking about our good ole days, gossip a little, and did some baby talk. One uncle brought his wife and his little 3-month old daughter. She is so adorable. Mommy actually has met this little girl a few times now, but it's the first time I got to hold her, since we had such a small group tonight. It was an amazing feeling to hold her. Even before she is 3 months old, she had amazing neck control. When I first met her, she's only 2.5 months and she could hold her head high. In fact, she prefers being in a vertical position, than horizontal. She was smiling and talking to me. Her little cooing was just so adorable. At that moment, Mommy missed you big time. And for a very short split second, I wish I could be pregnant again and have another baby.

She was the same age as when you were home in between the two hospitalizations. You were just as cute then. But I couldn't get a smile out of you, and you didn't coo much. I never got much eye contact, and your neck was always floppy. It was such a big difference. Mommy misses holding you.

During our conversation, I briefly mentioned about my two hospitalizations at Kaiser giving birth. This uncle and his wife didn't know about you. I didn't give them any details, I thought words have already spread and they would have known. I just said you've been gone two months. The other uncle directed them to my Facebook page. It was such a long story I didn't know how to begin. If they had known, I wouldn't mind talking about it. But telling your story from the very beginning is a little difficult.

On the other hand, I read a story about this woman faking her pregnancy and giving birth to a terminally ill baby. My initial reaction was, what a moron! How could you fake something like this?? But then, once I calmed down, I started to think: she did lose a baby back in 2005, was it Post-Traumatic Stress Disordern, Munchausen by Proxy Syndrome, or any other kind of mental illness? No normal person who do such a heinous thing. Something has got to be wrong here, right? She said her lie got out of hand and she didn't know what to do. But, why would you do that in the first place? I don't know, but I am glad people eventually found out it's a hoax.

I guess we really can't believe everything we read on the internet. It would be naive to do so anyway.

Don't forget to keep praying for mommy's pregnant friend and her family. You're closer to God than me, so you need to put in a good word, ok?


Miss you,
Mommy