Something is definitely wrong with Logan.. but what is it?

At first, I was planning to do a happy blog on Aidan's preschool days. Before I could do it, I now have to write about Logan, who is hospitalized at Santa Clara Kaiser again.

Yesterday at around noon after I finished feeding and burping him, I had him in my arms while I was watching tv. Then suddenly, I felt his whole body tensed up. When I looked down at him, his face started to turn dusty and lips were turning pale. I immediately sat him up and pat him on the back. He was still tensed up in a boxer position with his knees up as well. I then put him on my shoulder and pat him some more. Then I felt his body loosened up and he let out a breath. Of course, this scared the heck out of me. Unfortunately, episodes like these happened for the rest of the afternoon. After two episodes in less than 30 mins, I called Hank and called Kaiser. While I was on the line with the operator, Logan did that again. The advice nurse checked in with the doctor and suggested us to go to the ER. Since Logan was fine at that time I was talking to her, they did not recommend calling 911, but to find someone to be with him while I drove. However, I was so scared that he did that again while I was driving and there's really no one who could come along with me. I ended up calling 911 and the operator was with me the whole time until the Fire Department arrived. I recalled my voice was shaky when I talked to her and she had to repeat a few questions several times.

The fire department arrived within minutes. Thank you! They hooked him up to the monitors, asked me some questions and took Logan to the ER in SSF. I dressed, called Hank, and immediately headed to the ER. When I got there, the nurses were already putting probes on him and taking his temp. I saw him turning dusty again while they were doing it. A series of blood tests were done, CT scan, chest X-ray and they even had to put a catheter in his you-know-where to draw urine out (that was the first time he had it done and was painful to watch). He was probably at the ER from 1-5 p.m. He turned dusty almost throughout his ER stay. The worst period was when he had the episodes every 4 minutes. It seemed like he opened his eyes, gazed into space and then it happened. We wondered if he was having seizures. At around 4:15 p.m., Hank and I went out for the snack while waiting for the Santa Clara EMT crew to come up. When we got back, the nurse was holding Logan and his episodes miraculous stopped. Even after he was transferred to Santa Clara Kaiser, those episodes disappeared. While Logan was being transported to Santa Clara, Hank and I went to pick up Aidan from preschool and then we all went down to the hospital to see Logan.

At first I was wondering if I was imagining all this. I could tell from his face that it was coming even before the monitor beeped. I was able to stimulate him before he turned all purple on me like his last hospitalization. But no, I wasn't imagining them. They all saw it. I remember even asking Hank if I was imagining and if he saw Logan changing color.

But since around 4:30 p.m. and up until we left the Santa Clara Kaiser at 8 p.m., he didn't have any episode anymore. They were doing some more blood work, and another chest x-ray. I have requested him to get an EEG done on his head (he was going to get one anyway in the next couple weeks), to see if there's any abnormality going on. For some reason, it seems like the brain just tells him not to breathe. Very likely, they will find nothing, and Logan will be discharged and then something bad is going to happen again and we will repeat the whole vicious cycle.

Something is wrong. But after all this time, we still don't know why. The ironic thing was, we just went to see Logan's neurologist yesterday and everything was peachy then! I know the brain is a very complicated body part that we don't know everything about it. But, I want to know what's wrong with my baby. It's been way too long. We might not be as lucky as we have been in the future.