I was gonna do this and that.. but...

Hi Sweetheart,

How are you doing today? Daddy was bugging Mommy for the last hour and a half on finalizing the options and upgrades for our new place. We are having our appointment with KB Home tomorrow. Daddy is always so last minute. Should have done this earlier so that it won't cut into my time in talking to you! When Mommy went to the model home, I saw this beautifully decorated nursery with a Winnie The Pooh theme. It was so pretty and I thought, maybe I could get that for your future room. I like the nice, comforting colors of green and yellow, and the stencils on the wall. The last time we went for our first appointment, before the diagnosis and all the bad news, I really wanted to get you that room. At the time, I knew the road ahead of us would be tough. But I was mentally prepared to do whatever it takes to get you home. I knew it would be difficult if you were to have the tracheostomy, but I was up for the challenge. Unfortunately, things have changed so much within the last 2-3 weeks. The dream of decorating a nursery for you is gone. I never really got to decorate one for your big brother, since we're only renting. Now that we're finally going to have our own place, I had big plans on decorating your room and your big brother's. Instead of decorating your room, we would have to decorate your lawn level marker for your grave. :(

Mommy didn't do much today. It was 95 degrees here and our house was just stuffy and hot. The only time Mommy got to breathe was when I was driving your big brother Aidan to and from school, while blasting the A/C. Mommy also called up four different travel agencies and price-check/compare the airfare to fly back to Macau to see Ah Gung and Ah Po. I tried to check the airfare and hotel packages to Hong Kong as well, so that we could head over to Disneyland. I think Mommy is just going to take your big brother on Eva, and then head to Hong Kong on the weekend with your uncle and auntie.

Mommy didn't get a chance to order the Family Team T-shirts for the walk this Saturday. Just when I was planning to order them and to see how many of our friends are going, that's when your diagnosis came in. I didn't have the mood or the energy to order the T-shirts. But now the walk is fast approaching, I am hoping I could get some shirts from the March of Dimes office. I think I am going to give them a call tomorrow, or I'll just go print some shirts myself. I should also call up the T-shirt company to see if they could Fedex it to me. If not, we'll just walk for the walk in your memory.

Love you,
Mommy